i was on hiatus, feeling grateful that the week of his birthday passed and i emerged from the black hole. The week after was better-i was able to focus and get thru some deadlines. Then the sadness engulfed me again and i just went thru the motions. I move in and out of sadness. Sometimes i forget, i look at his picture and almost believe that i will be coming home to him. Then i remember. it is still a shock-maybe that won't ever end.
i was on a trip this weekend, to a family wedding and i was in and out-sometimes ok, then something would strike me and i would be tearful. The kids were with me and at some point we were all tearful, each apart yet together. Traveling is still surreal, i almost think to call him and tell him that i arrived safely.
one foot in front of another.