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Monday, November 29, 2010

Brick Wall ahead

Well, last entry I thought I had turned a corner. Saturday eve I encountered the brick wall. As soon as the last guest left after the Thanksgiving weekend, the sadness enveloped me. I spent the rest of the weekend sad and inconsolable. I thought about other Thanksgiving weekends when after it was over, it was Bruce and I and I suddenly missed him so much. And I also thought about the month ahead. First there would be the Christmas movies and discussion of the holidays. People will be planning trips and visits. Everyone who doesn't travel will be looking forward to spending time with loved ones at home. I am not looking forward to the emptiness that will accompany my holiday. And I am sufficiently sad enough so that I am not inclined to try and make the best of it.

I know that I need to work on this last piece.
Maybe tomorrow.

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