My dear friend Robert died tonight. Robert was married to my best friend and I knew him since 1974.
He was sick for such a short time, and now he is gone. I am so sad, sad for him, sad for my best friend, sad for his children.
I am also overwhelmingly sad that my friend has to make the same journey that I made 4 and 1/2 years ago. I would not wish this path for anyone-but especially not the people that I love.
Lil and I met in summer camp in 1972 and we totally bonded. She has been more like a sister than a friend. And now I am so far away, so distant, and so unable to be more than a text message.
How can we endure such pain and still keep on going? The losses add up and still we must be able to manage the day to day "stuff" that in the larger scheme of things seem so unimportant. But I guess that to a certain extent, the mundane tasks distract us from the loss. We get buried in the little things-walking the dog, shopping for milk, taking out the garbage. Maybe those routinized chores enable us to move along.
I keep on thinking about the losses though, and the minutiae that we are preoccupied with.
Robert is now out of pain, I am hoping that eventually the pain will subside for those of us left after the loss.